Gastroscopy tomorrow...ughh

Well I have my gastroscopy tomorrow.  They want to check to make sure I have no infections, ulcers, or whatever in my stomach and throat etc.
So this means I have to fast after 7pm tonight, well no solids anyway.  so looks like a night of water and tea for me, and probably an early night.  I do have to be at the hospital at 830 am.

On Wednesday April 2nd I have my fluid diet training as well.  That should be fun, learn how to just eat....er drink fluid nutrition for just 3 weeks leading up to surgery. The reason for this diet is to shrink my liver to make it easier for the surgeon to get at my stomach.  Also to help make sure i'm fairly clean inside, lol.

As for my weight right now, it's disappointing, I was so sure I was doing pretty good, but the scale says different.  Up 2 lbs, ughhh...could be the chinese food I had last night for supper.  Oh well, can't beat myself up right now, it is probably the last time I'll have chinese food for a really long time. : \

Well here's to an evening of fasting and to an even better next few weeks until my next entry!! 

Don't forget to live, love and laugh everyday!!!

Day 1...well not techinically but day 1 of blogging

Ok so here it is, here is the start to my journey.  Last year around this time I had gone to my Dr. regarding my excessive snoring.  He suggested I have sleep apnea and referred me to a respiatory specialist.  Turns out I do have mild sleep apnea, I stop breathing 6 time/hour when I sleep, scarey!! So now I sleep with a c-pap machine to help keep my airways open at night and reduce the snoring.  On a side note the c-pap is a great hang over preventer...but that's another unrelated story.  My Dr. also asked if I was interested in the Bariatric clinic.  Not knowing that that even existed or what it was about I said sure.  For those that don't know Bariatric is another word for obese basically and I am.  Surgery wasn't an option for me right from the beginning, I wanted to try to lose my weight au natural...I had always thought of bariatric surgery as an easy way out.  Well was I wrong! At the clinic I spoke with an occupational therapist to help with time management, meal planning, stress management etc.  I spoke with an RN regarding blood pressure, meds I'm on, what I could expect from the clinic and how much weight is realistic to lose.  I also spoke with a Registered Dietician who helped me re-understand the importance of portions, vegetables, proteins etc.  All 3 of these wonderful woman made me feel and understand that my obesity wasn't just a product of me overeating or being a pig.  It is a disease , its a food addiction, a mental health issue, not just a physical issue.  I see it similar to alcoholism, where I would turn to food to comfort in times of stress, boredom, celebration etc just like an alcoholic turns to booze in the same situations.  It was slowly killing me and still is.
      A few months into the clinic I was seeing a little progress in weight loss, but was feeling so much better about myself and what I could accomplish.  And after speaking with my psychiatrist I came to the realization that maybe surgery is what I needed to do to help me.  I also no longer think of surgery as an easy way out.  It is major surgery with major possible complications and a major major lifestyle change.            
     So now I have a surgery date, June 20th, 2014, and i feel like my journey is really just begninning.
I'm hoping those reading this will be supportive and celebratory as I lose the weight I so desperately need to lose.  I 'm gonna struggle i'm gonna fall, but I can get back up and succeed!!

March 20 2014 Starting weight 270.4lbs